• 8th May 2012

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secret admirer 100 words post-it sunshines flowers cheetos love-love

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Secret admirer

In a post-it note, she wrote that I smelled like sunshines and flowers. Weird, but here’s some logic: those two things defy gravity in the same way that I resisted the pull of her rotund figure.

She smelled like Cheetos. I love Cheetos, but not love-love, you know?

I threw the note out, but the next day there was another. “Sunshines and flowers.” A fortnight and fourteen notes later, I had to fire her. She left.

The notes never stopped coming. I’m not sure where they come from, but I keep in them in my desk drawer. It’s almost full.

  • 27th April 2012

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capsized pipedream arnold 100 word stories drabble long-sitters bathroom sink love

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Pipedream

Arnold found he was in love with the office bathroom, in particular the bathroom’s sink. It whispered sweet things to him and told pointed jokes, things about his coworkers no one had ever seen.

Arnold kept it very quiet. He was the guy who made fun of the Long-Sitters, as he called them. Now he couldn’t stay away.

Then one day it wouldn’t talk anymore. He never knew why.

Soon it was replaced, and the old sink was thrown out. 

Arnold misses the speaking sink. He thinks about it when he hears a flush, or the drip-drip of the rain.

  • 26th April 2012

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guacamole butt 100 word stories train stranger friend awkward

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Guac-butt, my friend on the train

It’s funny when someone you run into remembers you, and you don’t. You nod and squint and ask if they are sure just short of too many times. Ha ha ha, right?

But it’s funnier when they are lying and just feel like talking or making a new friend on the train.

“You don’t know me from that thing? At Dave’s?” They speak very loudly. “Yeah, I know that was you. You sat in the guacamole and the dog wouldn’t stop sniffing your butt! HAHAHA! You don’t remember? Oh it was too funny.”

Now the whole train thinks you’re Guac-butt.

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100 word stories drabble drab fab subway sun crayola dull dark grey black blue pink flamingo mac and cheese color

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From drab to fab

Why is the subway’s dominant clothing color a dull dark grey black blue?

I’m not saying it’s a problem, it’s fine, wear what you want. I just wonder why we don’t break out more.

Don’t say it’s because the people are underground, because most of them end up above the ground for most of the day. Or so I’ve heard. 

We should bring the sun down there and light that bad boy up. I’d wear Crayola 64-color Crispy Mac and Cheese pants to that commuter party. With a Pink Flamingo Strawberry Popsicle-flavored t-shirt.

And I wouldn’t be the only one.

  • 21st April 2012

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chambers subway glass beyond investor artist 100 word story drabble

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Just beyond the glass

An investor commissioned a secret project for a visionary young artist named Chambers. Chambers was given everything he demanded, construction and demolition crews, interior decorators, everything, right down to the last fork and knife.

They thought it would make the news on the first day, but it wasn’t until two months had gone by that a child on the C train asked his father if the subway could run through their apartment too. The boy was the investor’s son.

“No,” the investor replied. “The train only runs through Chambers’.”

No one else has noticed yet, but, believe me, it’s there. 

  • 15th April 2012

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red ribbon 100 word story drabble bum girl

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Red ribbon

I see you there, the red ribbon in your hair. What is this, the girl scouts? A secret club? Or are you really that interestingly dressed for work?

Does it distract you at your desk, while you twirl it? Do your coworkers look when they walk by? Did you wear it while you talked to your boss about that promotion today?

Were you looking for a date? Or compliments from your favorite bum?

I’ve got some good ones I’ve been saving for you. But you know what? You get no hoots this time. This bum thinks you’re trying too hard. 

  • 14th April 2012

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waddle penguin 100 headed north word subway story drabble missing winter in spring

A TEXT POST

Headed north

A waddling waddler waddled past me onto the train this morning. She sat down with a group of penguins twittering madly on their phones. They were headed north.

It’s funny how penguins sit. They have almost no legs, so really they can only stand, but they had the bench on the car, so I called it sitting.

I wanted to ask where they were from, where they were going, how they had gotten here, why they were visiting New York. But I figured they got that all the time. I didn’t want to bother them, so I went to work.

  • 13th April 2012

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subway 100 word drabbles stories why does the commute fascinate and entice me

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Just a little

What do you think, where are you from, where are you going? I want to know what movies you watch or what books you read, but more than that, what part you’re on, how you feel about it, how it makes you feel. We are all a million miles deep, or close to it, and we all have this shared experience everyday. Why can’t we talk about it, figure it out, show some support, not as anything more than some people riding in the same car? 

Come on, guys. We’re not just commuting, are we? Let’s hang out a little.

  • 12th April 2012

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earmuffs hipster black nail polish subway 100 word stories drabble scarves and scars hipsters wear flannel and headphones sometimes

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Earmuffs

She had that wide-legged power-stance, Subway balance without handlebars. Impressive. 

She pushed her hair behind her ears, and I saw black nail polish. A sign of either attitude or sexiness. I poked her in the back to ask, but was ignored. Must be sexiness. Sexy girls never like the cool guys.

I’m one of the cool guys. I wear plaid flannel and big headphones. I like thick scarves and deep scars.

When you see me on the train, or feel me poke you in the back, you should know, I’m not listening to anything. I just like wearing the headphones. 

  • 5th April 2012

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viking school skateboard norse mythology misleading tags 100 word stories drabble miss crabtree

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Pillage and plunder

There was a Viking going door-to-door, looking for his skateboard. He needed to get to school on time, but he couldn’t remember where he’d left it.

The Viking couldn’t be late for school today. He was already in trouble with Miss Crabtree for pillaging the sea of desks. And besides, he had a math test that morning.

At the third door, a small girl told him she’d seen it down the street near the sewer. She showed him where, and the Viking fished it out with his horned helmet.

“Good luck on the test.”

“Thanks little girl,” said the Viking. 

  • 29th March 2012

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broken ankle owie that hurts does anyone read keywords 100 word story drabble dinosaurs on the moon is a ridiculous idea and could never stand alone as a story

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First in cast

It was somewhere between the broken ankle, the painkillers, the cast, and the spaceship, that our intrepid hero found herself on the moon. And there were dinosaurs. Wearing moonboots.

The show was this Tuesday, and all the dinosaurs were abuzz. Everyone expected T-Rex to win with his rainbow-striped boots, but some of the pterodactyls and triceratops were putting up a fight, with the clever use of pink and orange solids.

In the end, our intrepid hero stole the show. Her boot and crutches were like nothing they’d ever seen. She stole the crown and crowd surfed on dinosaurs all night.

  • 28th March 2012

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subway story 100 word drabble pretend cotton candy esp fart wizard jail martha stewart

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Fun things to pretend on the subway

Pretend everyone is trying to decide whether they like pink or blue cotton candy more.

Pretend everyone is dancing in rhythm like at a party.

Pretend everyone is trying to use ESP, and then figure out what they are saying.

Pretend everyone else is trying really hard to not fart.

Pretend everyone else knows magic, but they aren’t allowed to tell you or they’ll go to wizard jail.

Pretend everyone missed their stop three stops ago but no one wants to admit it.

Pretend everyone secretly watches Martha Stewart online at work, and can’t wait to see the next episode.

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mojo chambers subway 100 word story drabbles knobby hands rake of hair

A TEXT POST

A problem that I have

I always find it at Chambers. Where I lose it, I don’t know.

I usually notice it’s gone at the bar. I approach someone or I bump into the prettiest girl coming out of the bathroom. I figure my knobby hands or my rake of hair sends her off. Then I realize that it’s missing.

At Chambers, my mojo cowers under a bench. I shoo the people away and say sweet things to it to coax it out. Then I nab it, strangle it, and swallow it right there. Don’t even wash my hands. 

It always finds a way out.

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ugly bros band chopsticks 100 word story drabble underground

A TEXT POST

The ugly bros

We had a band called The Ugly Bros. It started as a joke. The five of us were conductors for the subway, and we’d play in different stations on our breaks. People liked us pretty well, I guess.

Pretty soon there were too many people to have the concerts underground, so we started setting up in parks around the city.

Our biggest fans were homeless people and small children. Neither grouped seemed to mind the other, except for the kids’ parents.

We were the voice of the people. We played anything and everything. We mostly played with chopsticks on trashcans.

  • 25th March 2012

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100 word story drabble the deleter oval office aunt marge it technician

A TEXT POST

The Deleter

He was The Deleter. He deleted anything and everything, without a second thought.

Soon, he was in the Oval Office. “I hear you… delete… things.” The Deleter nodded and deleted the memory, eyeing the computer.

He was a small man. They shoved him into a box and shipped him off.

The enemy, in his own Oval Office, opened the package labeled, “Surprise gift from Aunt Marge!” The Deleter unfolded and presented himself as an IT Technician.

Soon, all of the data was gone. “Oh, it’s no problem,” said the enemy, revealing a drawer filled with hard drives.

“I’m The Backer-Upper.”

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